Let's go Salsa-loca

Hola, amigos, com' esta?

That's the only Spanish I know (that, counting 1-10 and "No, I'm not interested, just buy me a drink please". Don't ask me why I know that). Recently, I found myself out of breathe when climbing stairs and generally tired. So my doctor told me to add some aerobics to my lifestyle. Yep, he said "go and exercise, you're getting fat". Gorilla -__-

I tried jogging (got so bored and all the dust), skipping (does this jumping up and down give me wrinkles?), bicycle-riding (aarghh, I just fell off), swimming (mehn, the other chicks at the pool look so hot in their skimpy bikinis, shame caught me). Nothing was really working and my waistline was expanding. So my friend Win-Win invited me to go latin-dancing with her (dances like salsa, merengue, bachata, kizomba). I believe my first thoughts when I got there was:

"na wa for una, your ancestors didn't do this, they were content with Atilogwu, waddya mean I have to do turns in high heels, do I wear heels normally, una don marry sef, abegi I can't whip mah hair sexily like Shakira, it's natural, guy your finger will tangle inside if you attempt to run it through mah afro, I don't even understand dis music, wetin be dis craze, ehh?"

I kept an open mind, and I'm glad I did. Omo, you should see me, and now I wear hot outfits and heels every Thursday night. Even my sarcastic sister has started thanking God for my new lease on life.

So it got me wondering: "what type of makeup will last on my face during such exertion?"

Here are a few tried and tested products I think will make the grade:

Eyes: Revlon Colorstay eyeliner, Make Up For Ever Aqua Black eyeliner, Milani Liquif'eye metallic eyeliner (my new favourite), Bobbi Brown gel eyeliner, Maybelline Color Tattoo 24 hr cream shadow (my other new favourite. Maybelline Great Lash mascara amd Make Up For Ever mascara.

Lips: pretty much anything that has a lot of pigment and will pop and draw attention to your lips when you're doing a slow back-arch to the floor. Try Maybelline Colorsensational lipstick in Neon Red, MAC matte lipstick in Lady Danger, Sleek pout paint in Pinkini or Port Red, MAC lipstick in Ruby Woo (combine this with Zaron lip pencil in Red for a killer), Flormar Lipsticks, Black Up Jumbo lippencil (lip-pencil and lipstick combined in one), Julie Hewett Icons lipsticks (these are to die for).

from left: Laura Mercier oil-free primer, Julie Hewett lipstick, Black Up jumbo lippencil, Flormar lipstick, Maybelline Colorsensational lipstick, Sleep pout paint, MAC lipstick, Zaron lippencil, Maybelline 24-hr cream shadows, Bobbi Brown gel liner, MUFE Aqua eyes liner, Milani Liquif'eye liner, Maybelline Great Lash and Colossal Volume mascaras, Bodyography primer

I'll pretty much leave off powder, it can get gross having that sweat roll into thickly applied powder. Instead, why not opt for a matifying primer and Clean and Clear Blotting sheets, to keep the oil off, and you'll need some face tissues, to dab sweat off. There is a foundation that does hold up pretty well under these conditions, but it'll be my little secret for now (wink).

If you know you've got a hot night out, feel free to rock any of these. Salsa happens on Thursdays and Saturdays at Piccolo Mondo, Idejo street, VI. and there are salsa classes tuesdays and wednesdays. Just ask.

And if you're a married couple, grab your man and go learn Kizomba, a hot new Angolan dance, all I can say is ABEG NO DULL, GO LEARN IT GURL. In 9 months' time, come back with your testimony.